Periodic Newsletter

Volume 8 • April 2022

Hand-in-hand, we can work to remove stigma and provide needed support and guidance  to our congregation members and their families who are suffering.

Dear Savannah Faith Leaders,
You are receiving this e-newsletter because we have designed it for you. This is our eighth edition.

We are the non-profit Interfaith Addiction Coalition of Savannah, founded  in January, 2019. Our mission is to provide education and support for faith leaders on the subject of addiction and recovery. This disease destroys lives and families. It thrives on secrecy.

Our e-newsletter readership has expanded to include health care, treatment and mental health professionals, as well as leaders of organizations in Georgia focused on addressing addiction in our midst. Some of our readers are also people who have experienced addiction and discovered the gift of recovery.

IN THIS ISSUE
* Alcohol: Legal But Lethal. When Addiction Takes a Life.
* Why Al-Anon is a valuable tool for all faith leaders
* Family members describe how Al-Anon has saved their sanity and given them their lives back – whether their loved ones find recovery or not.
* Show your congregation that you support the many, free 12 Step meetings in our community. Let us know, and we’ll deliver the goods.

Newsletter Design: Ardra Hartz
Newsletter Content: Carol Pine and members of Al-Anon
 
 

Al-Anon:   What Faith Leaders Need to Know 
About This Lifesaving Program

How many people do you know who have a problem with drinking alcohol? How many people do you know who are in Alcoholics Anonymous or would benefit from it?

       As a member of Savannah’s faith community, it is important to know about these invaluable organizations helping friends and family members who are affected by the negative effects of someone else’s drinking. Similarly, Narcotics Anonymous (NA) is a “sister” 12-step program to AA.
         For every person participating in AA or NA,  there are no less than five other people who are affected by the disease of addiction.  These people are parents, spouses, significant others, siblings,  children and close friends. Everyone is impacted by what we call “the family disease of addiction.” In this modern age, we know that alcoholism and other forms of addiction are diseases, not moral failings.
         Al-Anon is a program for the friends and family of someone who has a problem with drinking.  Alateen is a program for teens and pre-teens of someone who has a drinking problem.  These two programs are both based on the 12-steps of AA and are closely related to Alcoholics Anonymous.  The Twelve Steps of Alateen and Al-Anon are a foundation for personal recovery from the negative effects of someone else’s drinking.
         ACOA, another 12-step recovery group, focuses on adult children of alcoholics and what they can learn about themselves and how the disease has affected them.

      People who live or have lived with alcoholism understand the disease as few others can. I am one of those people. We understand that we did not cause the disease of alcoholism, we cannot control it,  and we cannot cure it. We know that by changing our own attitudes, we can choose recovery and  better lives for ourselves while – at the same time — giving understanding and encouragement to the alcoholic.
         Al-Anon , Alateen and ACOA are programs that were developed and are run by people who have been affected by someone’s alcoholism.  We are not professional counselors or therapists.  We are simply a group of people who share our experience, strength, and hope about living and dealing with the effects of alcoholism in our lives. There are many meetings in the Savannah area and newcomers are always welcome. Please see the link below.

        https://lobster-crane-fpg8.squarespace.com/meetings

        There are no Alateen meetings currently held in Savannah, however, people of all ages including teens, are welcome at any Al-Anon meeting. 

 

     Our members are currently living or dealing with an un-treated alcoholic.  We also have members who are living or dealing with someone in a 12-step or similar recovery program such as Narcotics Anonymous and Nicotine Anonymous.  We have members who no longer have an active alcoholic in their lives, but who either grew up in an alcoholic home, or lived and dealt with alcoholism in a family member or a friend. Alateen and Al-Anon are for anyone whose life has been touched by another person’s drinking.
          In addition ACOA, Adult Children of Alcoholics, also meets in the Savannah area. The meeting is held at 6:30 p.m. on Thursday at the ConneXion Church, 5411 Skidaway Road, Savannah (912-417-4108 church office).  The zoom access codefor this meeting is the following: 712 697 268.

           Like Al-Anon and ACOA, AA, NA and Nicotine Anonymous are all anonymous fellowships.  Everything that is said in a group meeting, or member to member, is strictly confidential. This is the only way a person can feel free to say what is in his or her heart and mind. This assurance of confidentiality paired with openness is precisely how we help each other in our respective programs.
            The sole purpose of all of these meetings is to help the family and friends of the person struggling with the deadly disease of addiction.  There are no dues or fees for membership in these 12-step groups. Each group is fully self-supporting through voluntary contributions of its members.    

            Dear Faith Leaders, if you have questions about 12-step programs in general and Al-Anon in particular, I would welcome your  call: 912-704-3332.

                                                                              –Kristin L. 

        We are grateful to the following Al-Anon members who have shared their personal perspectives. The tradition of confidentiality in Al-Anon is to use first names only. We sincerely thank Kristin, Willie, Ginny, Celia, Glen, Carla and Allen.
  Alanon: A Helpful Tool in Your Ministry 
      Far too often, we whose lives are interwoven into the life of an alcoholic or addicted loved one, eventually end up on your doorstep or the doorsteps of the medical profession.  Most often, this desperation is profound.  We — the wounded sober victims living with someone afflicted with the disease of drug addiction or alcoholism — make the assumption that you can help us find survival. We are so lost and confused that we grasp at your spirituality or your title in the hope that your wisdom, guidance and healing will save us.  Some of you may know addiction intimately, even personally. For many of you, however, coping day- to-day with someone you love who is controlled by addiction is a completely foreign and daunting reality.
       The community of Al-Anon can be a very helpful tool for you in your ministry.  As much as you can help an alcoholic or addict stay alive by guiding them toward Alcoholics Anonymous or Narcotics Anonymous, our community of Al-Anon can be a vital life-giving resource when you find yourself ministering to a loved one of an alcoholic or addict.
        When we speak to you, we expect anonymity because Al-Anon family groups require complete anonymity.   Al-Anon members listen respectfully because we all share the trials of addiction.  For someone living with an addicted person, Al-Aanon offers a spiritual formula for gradual growth, understanding, and healing from within ourselves. We learn to surrender and stop fighting this disease and heal with the help of our “higher power” that we each define personally. 
          Please become familiar with Al-anon and when and where the meetings are held in our community (A list of local meetings is in-person and zoom meetings is included in this e-newsletter).  I pray that God leads you to put Al-Anon into your arsenal of spiritual tools for those marred by addiction in search of peace and healing.
                                                                                  –Glen S.
       
Experience, Strength and Hope 
           My name is Allen. I am a proud dual member of both the Alcoholics Anonymous and Al-Anon fellowships in Savannah. My sobriety date is 8/11/18, and by God’s Grace and loving mercy I was led into my first Al-Anon meeting on 10/26/19.
          I was introduced to the 12-step rooms in 2004, and I remember hearing that I was too young to have a problem. Needless to say, multiple arrests later I was fortunate enough to hit a bottom, surrender to my disease and ask for help.
           I was a college graduate who grew up in a church, yet I was clueless when it came to alcoholism and addiction as a disease. As I worked the 12 steps, I learned that my mom was put up for adoption because her father was an alcoholic. I realized that alcoholism affected me even before I was even born.
          In Al-Anon I learned that I did not cause alcoholism in my family, I cannot control it and I cannot cure it. Instead, I found a program of recovery that allows me to find contentment and happiness whether my loved ones are still drinking or not.
          According to Al-Anon literature, our organization “throws open its doors to those who can best benefit from the shared experiences of others in like circumstances — regardless of race, religion, social standing, or any other external consideration.”Al-Ananon is a safe place where anonymity is protected.
          I am so grateful I discovered both Al-Anon and Alcoholics Anonymous. It works… it really does.
                                                                                                                                                          — Allen
        
“We Share Who We Really Are”
 

        Al-Anon is for families and friends of alcoholics because alcoholism is a family disease. Even if you are not an alcoholic, you suffer the effects of it.
        I have been a member of Al-Anon since the early 1990s and I’m grateful for this 12-Step program every day.  Meetings come in all shapes and sizes, where we share our experience, strengths and weaknesses, where we gradually become less afraid to share who we really are.  These meetings are for me and my co-members; they are not for the alcoholic. When listening to others share,  “We take what we like and leave the rest.”  In Al-Anon, we truly begin to be true to ourselves and live our authentic lives.

                                                                                –Willie

 

        

Alcohol: Legal and Lethal

March 18, 2022

        This week in Savannah, a woman died alone of alcohol poisoning.
        She was one of 261 people in America who died from alcoholism on that particular day, and she is one of more than 95,000 people who will die this year.
        The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention calls alcoholism the leading cause of preventable death in this country.
        I met my new friend about seven years ago in a church on tiny Tybee Island – dubbed, quite accurately, “a drinking island with a fishing problem”. We attended a women’s Alcoholics Anonymous meeting hosted by one of our churches.
        I watched this gifted woman regain her vitality, her health and her profession as she discovered the gift of 12 Step recovery.
        Then she disappeared. Our attempts to bring her back into the safety of AA failed as her brushes with the law, Facebook rants, bitter arguments with family and her isolation increased.
        Addiction, we are told, is cunning, baffling, powerful, and patient. It doesn’t matter if a person has 30 days of sobriety or 30 years. The disease of addiction lives with us forever and it is ready to assert itself at any time. In fact, while we attend our weekly 12 Step meetings, we are told that our disease is out in the parking lot doing push-ups. This is no joke. If we find healthy recovery and then we relapse, we will return to an even worse state of addiction that has progressed unabated.
        A young woman on Tybee Island–who has also struggled with relapse and now enjoys steady, continuous sobriety–calls alcohol “legal but lethal”.
        What can a faith leader in Savannah do if he or she sees signs of addiction or hears about it from friends and family?

        If you see something, say something

        Our Interfaith Addiction and Recovery Coalition and the Clinton Foundation are equipping our faith leaders with the knowledge of addiction and recovery that they need to act by speaking up and sharing their concerns. Please be the one who talks with any person in your congregation who is struggling with addiction, either personally or with someone they love.
        A number of years ago, Hazelden Betty Ford polled people who sought in-patient treatment and asked them how many people had talked to them about their disease. The average number was 45 to 50 people. Know this: your words can make a difference and secrecy can kill, whether you are the first to speak up, or the 50th.
        Addiction thrives in isolation and the stigma associated with addiction is powerful. Make your house of worship a place where you and others can openly talk about the realities of addiction, the real hope of recovery and offer genuine help.
        If a member of your faith community dies from the disease of addiction, encourage their family to say so in the obituary and give you permission to address the subject in your memorial remarks. How often have we heard people talk of a deceased person’s “courageous battle” with cancer, heart disease, ALS, diabetes, while never daring to mention the disease of addiction?
        The American Medical Association declared addiction a chronic disease in the 1950s. Please tell the truth to your faith community and help erase the notion that addiction is a moral failing.

        Let go of the outcome

        You are trained to be healers and change agents. If you intervene and the addict relapses or dies, do not assume that you said the wrong thing or didn’t do enough. Remember this: you are responsible for the effort, not the outcome. Addiction can lead people like me to choose our drug of choice over the people we love and even the life that we know is possible. Addiction is powerful and baffling, but also recognize the infinite power of prayer. In the third step of Alcoholics Anonymous, we learn to “turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understand God”. Recognize that any genuine, informed effort that you make as a faith leader is the best you can offer…and let go of the outcome.

      Don’t give up on anyone

       William Cope Moyers, in his book “Broken”, tells of his last days of drugging in a tough section of Atlanta. He was a journalist for CNN, but his drug use led him to believe that death was his best option. After more than a dozen treatment programs, Moyers found recovery from addiction to drugs and alcohol and today he is an important voice of Hazelden Betty Ford.
        Remember that there are many excellent resources available in greater Savannah to guide you as you reach out to struggling members of your congregation. Along with the Clinton Foundation, we will provide you with an extensive list of local resources, as well as up-to-date schedules for Alcoholics Anonymous, Narcotics Anonymous, Adult Children of Alcoholics and Alanon meetings in our area. You can reprint them and make these meeting schedules available to all who visit your house of worship.

        Together, we are building a critical mass of educated and committed faith leaders in Chatham County who can save and changes lives.

Carol Pine is a person in long-term recovery from alcoholism. She is the co-founder of the Interfaith Addiction and Recovery Coalition based in Savannah.
   

         

Faith Leaders, here is a tangible way to support recovery. Thanks to a team of Savannah volunteers in recovery themselves, we will deliver meeting information and schedules for Alcoholics Anonymous, Narcotics Anonymous and Al-Anon (and restock as needed) to your door. 

Reply here:     ardra.kh@gmail.com   If this link does not bring you to an email compose page, please just copy and paste it into your email’s compose screen. Tell us you want a delivery to your house of worship ( Its name and address please)  and we’ll do the rest.   Questions? Call  (651) 291-7236.
 
 

 

        

‘We Get Ourselves Back’

          I’ve been attending Al-Anon meetings for many years.  It saved my marriage, made me a better mother, and gave me the tools to be happy in any relationship! Before I came to Al-Anon, I thought I was responsible for my husband’s drinking.  After all, we had entered into the Sacrament of Holy Matrimony: I had picked him, and he had picked me. I loved him so much that I naturally wanted what I thought was best for him. 
          That is precisely where my problem started: what I thought was best…  I honestly believed that I knew what my husband should do to be happy and successful. I thought the result would be obvious:  he wouldn’t want to drink so much. 
          One day it occurred to me that I was trying to be my husband’s “God”.  I was trying to force solutions of my own on him; that made our whole situation worse. My hyper-focus on the alcohol caused turmoil inside myself.
           In Al-Anon, we follow the same 12 steps used in AA.  By following Step 3 and turning my life over to God’s care, by trusting my Higher Power and totally surrendering control of my husband’s life and choices, I finally found peace.  It took me a long time, but I have faith that each person has their own journey through life and that God knows what is best for each one of us.  I have learned to love the man I married while lovingly detaching from my husband’s alcoholism and letting him live his own life.
          No longer do I search for his stash of beer and pour it out as I had so many times in the past.  No longer do I point out his faults or failings. Instead, I take an honest look at my own imperfections and see what positive changes I can make in myself.  I’m happy to say that my relationship with my husband is better than it has been in years.  I’m grateful that we are still married. I have started praying for my husband more, in a loving, respectful way.
           Al-Anon teaches us to realize how we have given ourselves away by focusing so totally on another person.  By hearing the wisdom of the group and listening to members share their journey, we learn to accept others and ourselves.  We learn to let go and — by doing so — we get ourselves back. We get back the self that God created us to be, even if our loved one continues to drink or drug. 
                                                                                          –Ginny
 

        

A Grateful Parent 

          My loved one experienced several types of drugs in high school. The real nightmare came with a phone call a few years later:
          My son was in the back of a police car on his way to jail. He admitted then that he was a heroin addict. I don’t know where I found the courage not to bail him out. He detoxed in jail and, after agreeing to go directly to rehab, he was released.
          I came to Al-Anon in 2016 as a scared, defeated and bewildered mother. No one I knew had been in jail and I had to overcome a lot of shame. I found hope in those meetings. Love and support were (and are) given freely to one another, just because we suffer with this family disease. We come in lost and frightened.
          After eight months in rehab, I went back to my old enabling ways and signed my son out. Several miserable and dark years followed. My son eventually became homeless. Today my son and I are both in a good place and very close. Without the Al-Anon fellowship to help me understand that I could not control or cure him, I might have never understood that I did not cause his drug addiction either.
          For this discovery alone, sign me: a grateful parent.

                                                                                           –Carla

 

         

‘I Was a Hollow Person’
 

      I came to Al-Anon several years ago. I found an understanding group of people who were all present for similar reasons.

      I had been affected by alcoholism and drug addiction by attempting to ‘help’ or control a son, a husband, my whole family. In the process, I lost myself; I was a hollow person. I had become consumed with situations and persons that I had no control over.

      In Al-Anon, I found my life was out of control and I needed to take care of myself.  Was I selfish to take care of me?  At the time, I thought I was. Didn’t my family need me and my attention 24/7 to help them all?

      I learned in Al-Anon meetings that each person has a belief system and a God of their own understanding.  By taking care of myself, I gave all of their respect and dignity back to them. I can only make decisions for ME. Each individual has his or her own choices. Each person has the right to make personal decisions. This represents freedom for me.  I have only my own personal struggles to make choices about.

      Since being in Al-Anon, I have matured! In 1935, Bill Wilson and others wrote the 12 Steps for Alcoholics Anonymous. Later Bill’s wife, Lois, and her friends adapted these steps and formed Al-Anon for friends and families of alcoholics.

      By practicing the 12 steps, attending Al-Anon meetings, reading Al-Anon literature, sponsoring and being sponsored by a fellow member, I have regained my self-respect, peace of mind, and dignity. I have become my own person again: I am no longer hollow.

      My son, the drug addict, joined AA, and is a respected citizen; I am proud of him. My ‘dry’ alcoholic, formerly my husband, is on his own path.

      I recommend the Al-Anon program for anyone who is dealing with alcoholism or drug addiction in their family or their friends.

      Al-Anon is a gentle Step Program in which anonymity is practiced. Al-Anon does not advertise. We share our stories and our hope with one another. I am a grateful member of this live-giving program.  

                                                                                  –Celia 

WE SEEK YOUR INPUT:    LET US KNOW  
      A topic I’d like to hear more about in the IARC Newsletter is:
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IF YOU APPRECIATE OUR WORK….
          Please consider a tax-deductible donation to the Interfaith Addiction and Recovery Coalition. We are a totally volunteer-run organization, and we have been granted our official 501c3 charitable designation by the State of Georgia and the U.S. Federal government. 

          If you wish to make a donation, please mail a check to the Interfaith Addiction and Recovery Coalition in care of  Ardra Hartz, 15 Rialto Court, Pooler, GA 31322

          We thank you.